Hello the Internet!
I've tried a few blogs in the past and none of them have really stuck for all that long. At one point, I thought that the problem was I didn't have enough focus, and figured it might be more effective for me to focus on one (or at least a few) ongoing theme(s). It's hard to say exactly how and why that didn't work, but one guess is the restriction of working within rigid categories put an unanticipated and unwelcome level of pressure to perform on me, which did its due part to squelch my desire to carry on writing.
As a child, I always loved creative writing, and would say I was pretty decent at it through college. In high school, I floated the idea of journalism as a career, if briefly. I'm not entirely sure what changed after that, though it was likely caused by a wide variety of factors.
Lethargy and distraction probably top the list, as wasting time online playing games and reading click-bait articles (which I may or may not be doing simultaneously at the moment...) do fulfill a primitive, tactile desire which critical thinking and stringing together comprehensive stanzas of sentences don't deliver on with nearly as much success.
Then there's the classic adage of "the more I learn, the less I know," which is closely tied to the act of growing up and attaining wisdom. The more we experience, the smaller we feel in comparison to the universe around us. On a personal level, this may seem dour and even all-around fatalistic, but as a hallmark trait of human civilization, it brings a sense of cool, liberated comfort to the idea of our existence.
Alas, there is a time and place in which thoughtful acceptance of one's insignificance in the scope of all matter gives way to a sense of tangible inadequacy among those I perceive to be my peers. Are they, in fact? What constitutes a "peer?" "How much reality is there to my sense of personal inadequacy?" We all experience weakness and failure at times, but I can't help being awestruck by those who hide their shortcomings and mask their pain so utterly seamlessly.
Ultimately, we are competing not with each other, but with the best version of ourselves that can be, but from there begs the question: who are these best people, and how can we find them? Do they want to be found? Are we worthy?
I've tried a few blogs in the past and none of them have really stuck for all that long. At one point, I thought that the problem was I didn't have enough focus, and figured it might be more effective for me to focus on one (or at least a few) ongoing theme(s). It's hard to say exactly how and why that didn't work, but one guess is the restriction of working within rigid categories put an unanticipated and unwelcome level of pressure to perform on me, which did its due part to squelch my desire to carry on writing.
As a child, I always loved creative writing, and would say I was pretty decent at it through college. In high school, I floated the idea of journalism as a career, if briefly. I'm not entirely sure what changed after that, though it was likely caused by a wide variety of factors.
Lethargy and distraction probably top the list, as wasting time online playing games and reading click-bait articles (which I may or may not be doing simultaneously at the moment...) do fulfill a primitive, tactile desire which critical thinking and stringing together comprehensive stanzas of sentences don't deliver on with nearly as much success.
Then there's the classic adage of "the more I learn, the less I know," which is closely tied to the act of growing up and attaining wisdom. The more we experience, the smaller we feel in comparison to the universe around us. On a personal level, this may seem dour and even all-around fatalistic, but as a hallmark trait of human civilization, it brings a sense of cool, liberated comfort to the idea of our existence.
Alas, there is a time and place in which thoughtful acceptance of one's insignificance in the scope of all matter gives way to a sense of tangible inadequacy among those I perceive to be my peers. Are they, in fact? What constitutes a "peer?" "How much reality is there to my sense of personal inadequacy?" We all experience weakness and failure at times, but I can't help being awestruck by those who hide their shortcomings and mask their pain so utterly seamlessly.
Ultimately, we are competing not with each other, but with the best version of ourselves that can be, but from there begs the question: who are these best people, and how can we find them? Do they want to be found? Are we worthy?
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